Biggest Fear

Thinking about my biggest fear before going to bed had me lost in confusion for a little bit. Keeping me up, debating between which fear would truly be best. Which fear really affects my thinking and the way I live? Then I decided to call my girlfriend to clear my mind before I went to bed and my biggest fear became clear. I fear public speaking, I fear snakes, I fear disappointing my parents or my big sister, however above anything I fear death. Not my own death, for I know when it is my time then I will go in peace and hope to have lived my life to the fullest, but I fear the death of a loved one.

The thought of someday not being able to call someone to clear my head lays my ultimate fear. Not necessarily my girlfriend, but my family. When I think of the fear to disappoint my family, I would much rather disappoint them, than not have them here to tell me they still love me and everything is alright. How much I go to my sister, my aunt and my mom with problems involving girls or school, they always have my back.

I think back to some specific experiences I have gone through and who helped me through those times, if I had lost them prior to that point I have no clue how I would have turned out.
As a younger student, not even 18, my maturity had not reached the level it is today. How I would have come out of that depended solely on my aunt and father who helped me every step of the way.